What actually happens in those moments when a small comment, a tone of voice, or a tiny frustration suddenly hijacks your entire emotional world? Many people think triggers just happen to you and often “come out of nowhere”. But the truth is that they tell a story about your past, your nervous system, and the way a part of you learned to interpret the world.
In this episode of The Happy Neurotics Podcast, Dr. Todd Berntson and I take a compassionate look at emotional triggers: why they feel so big, where they really come from, and how they can become some of our most powerful teachers. We explore how past experiences shape present reactions, why emotional flooding happens, and why the goal isn’t to silence your triggers but to listen to them.
By shifting from self-judgment to curiosity, you can transform triggers from moments of overwhelm into moments of insights that can help you respond, rather than react to life circumstances.
You’ll learn how to:
Recognise when a strong emotion is actually a trigger
Understand how past wounds get pulled into present situations
Pause and ground your body before the emotional surge takes over
See your triggered part as an inner child asking for safety
Ask the right reflective questions to understand what your emotions are trying to say
Use triggers as guides toward healing rather than signs of “being broken”
Why this matters
Triggers aren’t proof that you’re too sensitive or not coping well. They’re signals — messengers pointing toward places inside you that still need care, attention, or closure. When you slow down, listen, and stay present with these emotional surges, you build emotional resilience, deepen self-awareness, and show up more consciously in your relationships.
By approaching your triggers with compassion instead of avoidance, you can:
Interrupt old reactive patterns
Reduce emotional overwhelm
Heal the wounded parts that still shape your present
Strengthen your capacity to respond rather than explode, shut down, or spiral
🎧 Listen to the full episode for personal stories, clinical insight, and practical tools you can start using today.
💬 Your turn to reflect
Think back to a recent moment when something “small” set off a big reaction. How did that feel in your body? What part of you might have been knocking at the door? And how could you treat it next time it shows up again?
Timestamps
00:02 – What triggers feel like in real time
01:17 – Sudden emotional shifts and why they feel overwhelming
02:25 – How to spot disproportionate reactions
03:51 – Todd’s Rochester ice-cream meltdown
05:28 – When small stressors activate old wounds
07:06 – The past replaying itself in the present
08:47 – Emotional memory and “faulty lenses”
10:05 – Shame, criticism, and emotional flooding
11:15 – Why triggers reveal where healing is needed
13:04 – The “put it in a box” myth
15:00 – Treating triggered parts like a frightened child
17:14 – Listening without judgment
19:03 – Responding vs. reacting
20:53 – Questions to ask your emotions
21:37 – The power of presence in healing
📩 If this episode resonated, we’d love you to share it with someone who might benefit from a more compassionate understanding of their emotional world. Every share helps us grow The Happy Neurotics community — one beautifully imperfect human at a time.
And if you are enjoying the podcast and happen to be listening on Apple podcasts or Spotify, we’d love for you to leave us a review. It really helps the show grow and reach more people. Thank you for supporting the work we do.
