Have you ever felt like you should be further along in life (more independent, more confident, more capable) but instead you second-guess yourself, hesitate to make decisions, or find yourself leaning too heavily on others?
It might not just be “you.” It could be the hidden impact of parental over-involvement.
In this episode of The Happy Neurotics Podcast, Dr. Todd and I explore how coddling in childhood can quietly undermine a person’s sense of agency and competence later in life. We talk about why parents often overprotect (hint: it usually stems from their own unmet needs), how over-involvement can feel just as damaging as neglect, and what you can do as an adult to reclaim your confidence and independence.
You’ll learn how to:
Recognize what parental over-involvement looks like (and why it’s not always obvious)
Understand how “too much love” can disempower children in adulthood
Identify the hidden payoff that keeps you stuck in dependency
Practice small, practical steps to rebuild your sense of agency
Balance care and tough love — both in parenting and self-parenting
Why this matters
Over-involvement is rarely talked about, but its impact is everywhere. Adults who were coddled often struggle with independence, direction, and self-belief. By shining a light on this dynamic, you can:
Break free from patterns that keep you feeling powerless
Build resilience by practicing agency in small, doable ways
Create healthier relationships based on balance, not dependency
🎧 Listen to the full episode for stories, therapist insights, and practical steps to help you move from overprotected to empowered.
🎧 Bonus Teaser — Behind the Mic
After recording this episode, Todd and I kept talking — and the conversation got raw. We weren’t planning to share it, but it felt too real not to.
Here’s a short clip from that private follow-up chat, where I share the moment I realised growing up often means putting on your “big girl pants” and making some people uncomfortable.
▶️ Watch the teaser clip here
👉 Paid subscribers get the full behind-the-scenes video — including our unfiltered conversation on family loyalties, enmeshment, and the guilt that shows up when you finally start living your own life.
If you’d like to join our inner circle and get access to these private follow-ups (plus all future ones), consider upgrading today. We’d love to have you with us.
Timestamps
00:23 – What parental over-involvement looks like
03:19 – Why parents often overprotect
05:01 – The roots of over-involvement in parental neglect
08:17 – How coddling disempowers children
13:29 – Reclaiming agency as an adult
17:55 – Tough love vs. suffocating love
20:00 – A reflective exercise to spot your patterns
💬 Your turn: Were you more neglected or overprotected growing up, and how does that show up in your adult life? Hit “reply” and let us know.
📩 If you found this helpful, share it with someone who might need a reminder that “too much love” can sometimes hold us back — and subscribe to The Happy Neurotics Podcast for more conversations on self-awareness, emotional intelligence, and healthy relationships.
